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Waiting to Be Inspired
It’s been four years, ten months, and six days since my last entry. I could ask, ‘Where did the time go?” but there’s no need to. I know exactly where the time went and what happened. I can still feel the effects of the events that transpired during this time. There were profound losses; first my father, mother and twin sister, then my mentor and, most recently, my childhood friend. There were milestones; the girls leaving for college and Neal deciding when to retire. I found myself unable to do anything other than chop wood, carry water … good old Van the man has nothing on me. I suspended my coaching…
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Full Speed Ahead? Not So Fast.
I do love the change of seasons. I even enjoy winter; given a warm coat, a bowl of hot soup, time by the fireplace, and not having to drive on icy roads, that is. There’s a reason the Seasons of Change model is the foundation of my coaching practice. Not only is there infinite beauty in each season but they also provide us with the metaphors that can serve as guidance for navigating life’s ups and downs. Two days ago, I found three ants crawling around my kitchen. “Look,” I called out, “spring is coming!” Neal looked at me and said, “As you wish.” Of course he’d say that but I…
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You Got Rhythm
My mother loved to dance. She taught me how to listen to and feel the rhythm of the music. “You can’t dance if you don’t have rhythm,” she used to say. She taught me the waltz and the tango and some folk dances. The Flamenco from Spain, the Kalinka and the Cossack from Russia, the Tarantella from Italy, and of course several Greek regional dances. Music and dancing were a big part of my childhood and the main form of entertainment duringfamily gatherings, national holidays, seasonal celebrations, and informal gatherings. Folk music and dancing are deeply rooted in the collective experience of the people in world regions. They tell a story…
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Warning! Unknown Territory Ahead!
My twin daughters are high school juniors. Our family of four is dancing — or should I say spinning — to the tune of change these days. Not that change is new to us. These girls have been changing our lives since before they took their first breath and I wouldn’t have it any other way. The day I had my first ultrasound the doctor pointed to the screen and said, “Here’s one head and . . . there’s the second. Congratulations! You’re having twins!” Neal jumped up. He couldn’t contain his excitement. He was over the moon. If he had any cigars on him, he would have passed them around. …
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Authentically You!
“Come to think,” she said,” I’m not sure what success looks like. And, the truth is, even if I got what I say I want, I still wouldn’t feel successful.” “Pam” and I –– OK, her name isn’t Pam for obvious reasons –– have known each other for a long time. Her words that day weren’t a surprise. It was the way she looked at me that was different. She was opening the door to a conversation about something she’s always been sensitive about. “What’s going on?” I asked. “Well,” she replied, “I’ve been working with this coach for some time now. I’m trying to grow my practice and increase my…
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Off To College Already? How’s That Possible?
Five airports, three hotels, thousands of miles, two-car rentals, five college tours later, we got back home at 1 am on Saturday. I was tired and sleepwalked through the day. Neal and I went to New Haven to return the rental car and took the opportunity to go and sit at our favorite Mexican restaurant. There were margueritas involved. We needed this downtime but, of course, we still got to talking about . . . well, the girls and colleges. The thing about having twins is that there’s no dress rehearsal. For those of you who have heard me say this before, I apologize for being repetitive. You see, they do…
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Dare to Dream: Endings and New Beginnings
There is a stream that cuts across our backyard. Yesterday, it seemed completely frozen. When I looked closer I realized that, right under the ice, there was this faint vein of water moving. There is life at the bottom of this stream. There are frogs, fish, and all kinds of creatures snug in the mud, waiting and preparing for the thaw. Spring is coming and when the temperatures are right and the environment hospitable, they’ll find their way to the surface and they’ll begin yet another cycle. We too are creatures of nature. We live our lives in cycles; endings and new beginnings and everything in between. Every cycle has its…
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Life Lessons From Muir Woods
In July, our girls were off to Europe for two weeks to visit their best friends so, Neal and I, decided to visit California. It’s been a long-time dream to visit San Fransisco and Muir Woods. After three days in San Fransisco, we headed out to Muir Woods and Napa Valley. I knew Muir Woods was going to be a magical and sacred place to be in. What I didn’t expect was the deep silence and stillness that descended upon us as we entered the forest. I don’t think I can find the words to communicate what it feels like to walk among 1000-year-old trees that can be as tall as…
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Spring Forward
On Wednesday, March 20 at 7:09 am EST, Spring, the season of rebirth, made her entrance! There’s still snow on the ground but it’s melting fast. The weather report is warning us of yet another snowstorm coming Monday. It works like this, as one season gives way to the next; two steps forward, one step backward… dancing the tango and so we go round the seasons. Saturday morning, I made my usual rounds to the recycling center, post office, and driving the girls to their various activities. It was windy, at times cloudy, then sunny. The sky was a brilliant blue. There were even snowflakes falling, dancing their way down. When…
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On Driftwood and Other Finds
It’s been raining today on the island. I went for my morning walk a little later than usual. The girls had asked us to wake them up so they could go for a run while Neal and I took our walk. Not the best idea, in retrospect. I found myself getting pulled into a long conversation about the day. As expected, the girls are less than excited about the prospect of a rainy day. I find myself going down a familiar path; trying to make them happy and help them discover the gift of a rainy day; not the easiest task with two sixteen-year-olds. I feel my mood changing and I…
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A Time For Me
Waking up on the first morning of our vacation, I was greeted by the view of the sunrise over the harbor. Mary Oliver’s words came to mind. Hello, sun in my face.Hello, you who made the morning andspread it over the fields . . .Watch, now, how I start the dayin happiness, in kindness. I sat for meditation as the sun traveled up the horizon, its warmth increasing, coming through the open window. After meditation, Neal and I head to the bakery; a ritual we repeat every time we visit. We wake up early, go to the Old Post Office Bagel Shop, grab a cup of coffee, and head to the…
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Same Lesson . . . Time and Again
Twelve years ago, when I was trying to decide which direction to take my coaching practice in, the message that kept coming to me was . . . “Keep it simple!” Over the years and through many trials, when I’d find myself plagued with doubt, I’d remember and set myself straight. When in doubt, keep it simple! About two weeks ago, I facilitated a retreat for nine women at my home. It was lovely and profound. As I was preparing for the retreat, I decided to create small card bookmarks with words and phrases printed on them. The retreat participants picked randomly and used the messages they received for contemplation. Everyone…
